One of the most negative outcomes from this pandemic is the number of suicides and reports of people having trouble with being alone. The loneliness comes as a result of losing a loved one or from the inability to interact with the community or both. Although I have no power to bring back someone loved and cherished, I have made a number of observations as a result of my own loss.

Write that person a letter and record your memories of times spent with him or her. Do this before too much time passes and your memories have the potential to fade. You won’t have anywhere to mail the letter but there is some form of release or gratification in the process of recording your feelings.

Seek out someone or several people who knew both of you. It may be that those people are unaware of your loss and you will have a chance to catch up while exchanging recollections from the past. My life was vastly enhanced by the condolences and cards that I received, especially because of the kind thoughts that were included.

Develop a new friendship or alliance. Our community has a forum for those who have shared interests and although much of the contact is virtual, many neighbors find enjoyment from comparing stories or seeking information about a service or product that they need.

Identify new activities that you enjoy doing by yourself. It may be painting, jigsaw puzzles, indoor gardening, or writing a memoir. From personal experience, you may be surprised by how many people are eager to learn more about you, past and present. Plus, the act of writing your life story is cathartic, whether you publish it or not.

And finally, be very intentional about your belongings, your estate, and your legacies. It will make life much easier for those who follow you and it will take quite a bit of pressure off you. This is not morbid – it’s just good planning and something extremely worthwhile. Being alone doesn’t have to be awful; you may learn many new things about yourself. Shalom.

One thought on “Being alone

  1. All of this, such good advice. My daughter asked me to make recordings for her every day. I haven’t done it yet, but your writing has encouraged me to start. Shalom.

    Like

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